EDD

Today was your EDD

As much as I knew that was a measure that could destroy desired outcomes

I also knew that we should never underestimate you.

Through your bursting into existence 

I learned that they should never underestimate me either.

Six hundred and nineteen days ago

You were only two lines 

To two people 

In one room

With two hearts.

Before they were in four pieces.

Before more hearts made more pieces too.

You arrived cloaked in so much chaos and you still stopped time 

I have loved you a thousand lives before

I would love you a thousand more

And I am sorry

I am so fucking sorry

Eternally, perpetually, chronically sorry

That you were made in love but born in war.

There were so many hopes

Batbaby

Plans and dreams and ideas about who you’d be

A saving grace is that youd have fought against it all anyway

You were always going to be eccentric with those genes.

I don’t want to teach you 

Not one thing.

Stay pure

Show me 

Show me how to be like home.

My world collapsed for a star to be born 

You changed the whole universe

I am blank now

Clear of anyone’s fault 

Blame

Shame

But mine

Today was your EDD

I’m taking it back from the vultures

Our birth.

Our story.

You were born in peace, love, calm

We were safe

We were home

Just us

There was only us for hours and hours and hours

We were high on oxytocin with no instruments in sight.

Only our hearts sang.

Thank you for your patience 

Forgiveness

For your unconditional love

Forever I am grateful for your thriving as whole layers of myself were dying inside

I hope can keep becoming more of who you need

Of who I need.

Thank you

Thank you

Thank you

Thank you! 

Divine mirror.

Thank you for choosing me.

Today is our ADD.

Today we are free.